Awake and Awkward

Things are going ok, all things considered. My mouth (from where they took the tissue graft) is hurting a little less each day. The catheter, while being annoying and a bit awkward, is giving me little discomfort (except for those pesky night erections). The biggest consistent soreness comes from sitting and working at my makeshift desk all day – trying to avoid putting direct pressure on the incision site (use your imagination.) 

I’ve been working from home since Monday and that’s going fairly well, despite a few limitations, such as only having adobe reader installed on the work laptop instead of the much needed adobe acrobat. Still, I’m putting in more hours than I’m getting paid for, because it’s harder to stop at home, for some reason. I’m working on stopping that. 

My biggest consternation, of late, is my inability to get a full night’s sleep. I fall asleep easily enough, but wake up around 1 or 2am and lay there for hours trying to go back to sleep, rarely doing so. For instance, I’ve been awake since 2:30am and at 3:45am, I finally gave up and got up. It’s now 4:21am and I’m watching the embarrassingly awful Batman vs Superman on cable while the puppies sleep soundly on my lap (you know, to rub it in.) 

I get my Catheter out April 4th, so I have 13 more glorious days of a tube in my penis and peeing in a bag on my leg. It is not an experience I recommend, but if it corrects the problem it is meant to, it will have all been worth it. 

Regardless, I will be celebrating like mad, come April 4th. I’d better start mixing the cosmos now! 

Appreciate your health. Not everyone has it so lucky.

11 thoughts on “Awake and Awkward

  1. I understand all too well about your sleep issues. I get the same thing frequently, and yes, it is ANNOYING. Tired all the next day.

    I’ve found (for me) that going to bed early helps. Like, be asleep by nine pm. Don’t know if that would work for you, but I thought I’d mention it.


  2. I’m sorry to hear you’re not only in discomfort, but enjoying my sleeping patters. For example, the upstairs neighbors had their toddler running around up until 11pm. Once that stopped, I went to bed. I got woken up by one of the parents getting out of bed to use the restroom at 4am, and then again an hour later when the father had to get ready for work.

    I hope you feel better soon.


    • I absolutely feel very lucky and grateful that I do not have to deal with the kind of crap you have to deal with, and every time I read another post of yours about the upstairs neighbor I cringe. It’s the main reason why we bought a house, which I know is not something everyone can do. I’m just saying I wouldn’t have bought one if we could’ve found a place to rent that didn’t involve tolerating intolerable neighbors. I feel for you even in my current state. Thanks for the well wishes.


  3. Oh, yes, the sleep problems. Superman usually falls asleep quickly. I can lie in bed, tired as can be, but not go to sleep for an hour or two. Or I’ll wake up after 2-3 hours and be awake for an hour or two. Somehow, though, our wakefulness doesn’t usually coincide. When I’m awake, he’s asleep. Or else he’s pretending… hmmm.

    Glad to hear you’re gradually improving. I hope the “gradual” speeds up!
    much love!


  4. Glad to hear that your recovery is going okay and that the catheter hasn’t been horrible. I totally get the not sleeping thing. It has been a problem of mine for years. I frequently take zzzquill before I go to bed and it helps. It is basically over the counter benedryl. I still wake up, but fortunately go back to sleep. It helps when I am under stress because not sleeping just makes it worse.


    • I used to take zzzquil and would alternate between that and unisom, but I got nervous about taking it every night, so I stopped taking it. I don’t need it to help me fall asleep…I need it to help me stay asleep. I may need to start taking it again, but not until after my catheter is out. I’m afraid I’ll sleep through a malfunction 😦


  5. Wishing you continued recovery (although I wish it were speedier). I will celebrate with you on the 4th!! Would love to sample one of your famous cosmos. I am an intermittent sleeper so I can relate to your frustration and discomfort. Hope that will improve, once the catheter is removed and your healing is more complete. Hugs to you


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