Best laid (up) plans

I knew going into this surgery that I would be laid up for several weeks afterwords, restricted to very limited movement. No lifting, no bending, nothing beyond moving from one room to another or changing positions from sitting to standing to lying down. No activity more strenuous than walking. But, man, did I forget how boring it can be when you’re home alone all day basically restricted from doing most activity. I can’t do something productive like clean or cook because of all the bending and movement. I can’t organize anything because again, lifting and bending are a no-no. I can basically read, watch TV or movies, listen to music, and stare off into space. Even most Of the sedentary activities are difficult because of the Location of my incisions makes it difficult to sit up at certain angles.

Don’t get me wrong, having this time off to myself to just rest has its perks. For one, I’m basically spending the entire day with Harvey, petting him, cuddling with him, talking to him, discussing our life plans, etc. Second, it’s been a wonderful break from work. I don’t think I realized how much I needed this break. Third, I am mastering the Art of napping.

But it’s now been two weeks, and my brain and feet are getting restless and I want very much to do something more. I’m torn between wanting to do everything right so this healing happens completely and thoroughly so that I move forward with no complications; and testing the waters to see how much I can actually do before I am riddled with pain or regret. So far, the practical logical side of me is winning and I’m being a good little patient.

I had sincerely hoped I would blog more, given all this free time I have on my hands with nothing else to do. But I don’t have much to blog about, aside from reporting on my daily reduction in pain, my discontinuation of pain meds, my bland and boring diet, or my subsequent appointments to have various items removed from my body as I healed. (When I first came home, I looked a little like the bionic man who woke up before surgery was done and left before anyone could stop him.)

The good news is that the surgery was a complete success, I am healing really well and rapidly, and there are no indications that there will be any complications or problems moving forward. Once I get the remaining staples and “Cathy” removed (aka my catheter) next Monday, If I can just keep my Crohn’s flare ups in check, I should be able to live a long, healthy, and relatively normal life going forward.

I sincerely don’t miss Roger in the least, but I am surprised at how used to having him I was, and how much I’m aware that he’s gone. It has taken me a little while to break the habit of checking on him regularly.

While the physical manifestation of Roger is gone, we suspect his spirit lives on in the house, because there have been a few unexplainable incidents that we suspect may have been caused by Ghost Roger. A walking cane that we had purchased for my post surgery recovery last November disappeared and we could not find it anywhere in the house when we were prepping for my return home after this recent surgery. One day, while I was still in the hospital, Jeffrey was doing laundry in the basement and took a break to come visit me in the hospital. When he returned home, the cane was lying, mysteriously, in the middle of the basement floor by our laundry. There was also an instance where a side gate that is always locked was wide open when Jeffrey came home one day. And, finally, we’re pretty sure ghost Roger ate all my remaining get well donuts.

On another note, I am a famous work gay now. My agency used a picture I submitted on the banner of our internal HR Website for Pride Month:

I’m on the left, in case you’re wondering.

That’s about it for now. I’ll try to come up with something brilliant and entertaining to write every day going forward. If not, prepare to be blasted with pictures of Harvey and cheeky memes from Instagram.

32 thoughts on “Best laid (up) plans

  1. I hate to say this but always remember what you’re going through now. I do some charity work with the elderly and for some, this is permanent.
    Imagine having to keep all your food on the counter (except, of course, you don’t need to imagine). But tell the blogosphere what it’s like because people will have no idea otherwise.

    Liked by 1 person

    • I will never forget this experience. It is my 8th surgery and I’ve had two decades of dealing with Chronic illness. I am grateful for the medical treatment I have access to and for having even short periods of health. I know others have it far worse, with no relief.

      Liked by 2 people

  2. The longer I come to know you through your bloggings the more I come to know you as a soul mate. I follow as you share your life’s very real trials and tribulations, your ups and downs with health issues and the loving, caring Sean. I have said it before and I say it again, you inspire me to live my life and take it one day at a time and deal with everything as it comes at me. Right now I have been laid up again in bed for weeks taking, under great protest, a prescribed increased daily dosage of hydrocodone trying to curb the mind numbing pain. Of course there is also the daily hand full of meds to prevent kidney failure, to relieve the chronic constipation and stop the damage to the large intestine, and then the blood thinner to try to control the acute blood clots from being the death of me. I like to think I am as cool, calm and collected as you are right now. The visiting nurse and PA both say that I look fantastic. I say Hey, I ought to because I sleep 16 hours a day, forced to eat a healthy diet, and practice good daily personal hygiene. I like to think I have a good positive attitude like you do Sean. I could be in an immediate serious life threatening situation but I would be more worried about the single mom neighbor’s supply of food, formula and diapers. I cry and have bouts with anxiety and panic but I am learning to control it and to channel the pain away from my brain along a different path. Cranial-Sacral therapy does help. My phycologist thinks my following your blog truly helps me. She sees similarities in you and I so I am not certifiable as one might think me to be. Haha. Okay as usual I have rambled on and being a little foolish for my 69 years and I need to stop it right now. Keep on living and loving and being Sean, that sassy bear. Love the ones you got around you because there may not be anymore where those came from. Enjoy the sunset if you can.


    • Woody. I am happy if any of my journey has encouraged you to keep fighting the fight. Your battle is no less daunting nor less courageous (perhaps mores on both accounts) and I am inspired by you as well. Let’;s agree to both get healthier and stronger together!


  3. Good news on your successful surgery. You know what to do to give your time body to heal after this latest assault on your body. I remember all to well being laid up for twelve weeks following my leg surgery fir my torn quadricep leg muscle. Then the subsequent three months of physical therapy. You learn adjust your life to the new routine. Napping is fun isn’t it? Soon this too will pass and you’ll be going back to Commercial Street in Provincetown!


  4. Long time follower but sadly, I’m a rare commenter. My intestines have been carved up several times and patched back together… nothing as extreme as what you’ve recently been through, but enough to fully feel your pain and frustration. You continue to inspire me and remind us all to keep moving forward, persevere and never stop trying. X


  5. So glad to read that you are healing up well. I noticed your absence and was wondering how you were doing, but didn’t want to pry.

    Congratulations on making the banner! I hope your organization has more than three work gays, though.

    With respect to your disappearing cane, an alternative explanation might be Cup Sprites or Car Key Gnomes. I have heard that infestations of mythological creatures can be a real hassle to eliminate, so let’s hope it’s just ghosts.


    • I thought the same thing re: # of gay people. A solicitations was sent to the whole agency for pics and they only got 3? And I don’t know if those other two are LGBTQ+ or Allies, so I may still be the only out gay in the village, so far as I know.


  6. I can’t believe I know a Famous Work Gay. What a privilege. I’m glad recovering is going so well. Sorry you’re going a bit stir crazy. I wouldn’t mind Ghost Roger except for the recovery donuts. The son-of-a-….


  7. What a bummer you’re going through, replete with such frustrations. Thank Heavens that li’l Harvey’s there helping you hold onto sanity, even if it’s ‘only just’. Hope you can face the remainder of this episode stoically. You know it’ll be worth it.


  8. It sounds like you are doing all the right things, nothing, for all the right reasons. Ghosts will be exorcised. Bring on the puppy pics


  9. Good to hear that you are progressing well, and congrats on the banner! I know Harvey is enjoying your company! Your blog post reminded me about a surgery I had on my achilles tendon back in 2012. I was laid up for three months. I thought I’d go nuts, but eventually I got used to not being able to do what I normally would do.


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