Believe it or not, this idea came to me while I was laying awake last night, and although the original (brilliant) lyrics I thought up escape me, I couldn’t let go of the idea, so without further ado, I present to you..

“My least favorite things.”

(Sung to the tune of “These are a few of my favorite things” from “The Sound of Music.”)

Bezoars and gas pockets trapped in my tummy
Products that help me but rarely taste yummy
Slowed down digestion with sharp crampy stings
These are a few of my least fav’rite things

Strict liquid diets, martinis excluded
Exhaustedly staying in my bed, secluded
Bad outcomes haunting my imaginings
These are a few of my least fav’rite things

When my body
Quits digesting
All the food I’ve had
I simply give in to the ensuing pain
And then I get realllllllll-y sad

So what’s the point of my Crohn’s attack story?
IBS sucks and the details are gory
And though chronic illness can sure clip my wings
It helps if I blog share my least fav’rite things.

(What? You mean to tell me you don’t also work through your own personal pain by doing parodies of songs from favorite musicals?)