Unsettled

My dogs have helped me feel a sense of balance. While my whole world has basically become this house, this house has always been their whole world. You could say they are the my own personal yin and yang:

I’ve felt unsettled of late, unable to blog much or really express my feelings in words. WickedHamster may have scratched the surface, but even that doesn’t fully explain it. I just feel…unsettled. Like the world is changing all around me, for better AND worse, and I’m stuck in place.

In an effort to shake it, I’ve been focusing on completing small projects around the house, focusing on the part of the world I can control, purging and reorganizing drawers, closets, and cabinets, and purchasing a few accents (rugs, drapes, bedding) to give our abode a face lift. We also did some minor repairs, and rearranged the master bedroom. It’s given me a small lift, and given the exclusive space we’ve been occupying a slight facelift. It also gives me a sense of satisfaction to have completed these tasks. I like order and organization, and crave it the more chaotic the world out side my windows gets.

I’ve also escaped more into fantasy, my passion for comic book reading reigniting, re-reading old favorites in an attempt to make myself believe there is still goodness in the world, even if in the form of fictional superheroics which sprang from the hearts and minds of some people.

I feel very much in a “one day at a time” state of mind, not looking much beyond the next few days or weekend. While others make plans for “when this ends,” I’m buckling down for the “this is the status quo” long haul. Trying hard to be grateful for all my fortune, and not stress about the “what if’s.”

My mind and heart may be a mess, but my cabinets have never looked better.

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12 Responses to Unsettled

  1. Ron says:

    Sad to say this but I fear we will be in this unsettled state for years if not the rest of our lives. Life as we knew it is gone.

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    • Sassybear says:

      While I can’t say I have any proof to the contrary to allay your fears (or mine,) I probably have a shade more optimism that a vaccine or proper treatment will be found in the next 2 years or so (I hope.) But I don’t expect much change any time soon. All we can do is hang in there, prepare for the worst, and hope for the best.

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  2. Not sure if my comment posted…what “if’s keep me up at night. It’s why I started taking melatonin.

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  3. What “if’s keep me awake at night. It’s why I started taking melatonin

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  4. David Godfrey says:

    It will all be okay, thanks for mentioning the spouse.

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    • Sassybear says:

      He hit close to home with that post. Sorry I don’t respond more to your posts, but I do the bulk of my blog reading on my phone and, for some reason that escapes me, I am unable to post comments on non-Wordpress blogs from my phone 😡

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  5. todd and I are also doing “one day at a time”. I’ve been knitting something colorful. the cats are our calming touchstone. have you tried sketching again, you are a wonderful artist.

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  6. javabear says:

    These are strange times. Glad you have found a way to gain some control.

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  7. Urspo says:

    ying and yang is what first entered my mind when seeing the photo.

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