My mood, today, can be best described as cantankerous. I’m fairly certain, with scant encouragement, I could and would fly off the handle and launch into a tirade the likes of which few, if any, have ever seen me exhibit.
I credit much of this to feeling so worn out that it physically hurts to not be lying down. I did a lot this week. More than I have done in a while. Probably It has left me depleted.
I also bowled very poorly last night, only my second week with the new league, and one of my new team members made a comment to me that was not appreciated in the least.
It is rainy and cold outside today and the brief period of tolerable heat levels in my office are gone and we’re, once again, back to work in a refrigeration unit.
Almost all the interactions I have had with people in my agency, especially today, have been negative, unprofessional and irritating.
I am hungry. I spend a lot of time hungry these days, as the feeling of hunger is more desirable than the feeling of pain if I eat the wrong foods or the wrong amounts. However, I am craving a pizza, some donuts, a cosmos infusion, and an all-out snack binge and it is frustrating to have so many cravings and be able to sate so few of them.
There have been a lot of dark clouds over several blogger buddy heads lately and I feel a growing sense of frustration that comes with feeling connected to and caring about people but being too far away to be of any real comfort or assistance when needed.
I have so many projects at home I’ve started and want/need to finish but every time I consider attempting to attack any of them, I get overwhelmed.
Summer is gone and I didn’t get to enjoy any of it.
I am missing Clyde a lot this week.
My dreams have been distressful all week.
My back hurts.
I feel guilty that I have not planned anything for Jeffrey’s birthday.
Mostly, I hate that I’m in this pissy mood and that although I WANT to adjust my attitude, I don’t seem to be able to. In fact the harder I try not to be irritated, the more irritated I get.
I need a hot bubble both.
I need a massage.
I need a XXXX XXX or a XXXXX XXX to XXXX.
I need warmth and drinks and laughter and a delicious hot meal with appetizers and dessert.
Also, I need to stop whining.