I have had a rough 2 weeks health-wise. I went from a bout of strep throat last Thursday-Sunday to some undiagnosed cold/flu like that started Monday and seemed like a combination of a stomach bug/ low level flu-ish thing: headache, chills and intense lethargy. Then, yesterday, I went to the eye doc due to irritated, red, glassy eyes and was diagnosed with Blepharitis. (I know, right? Can you think of a less appealing name for a condition?) I’ve previously had, in my eye or eyes, Conjunctivitis, Iritis and Episcleritis, so I guess this just adds to my list of “eye itises.” Seriously, I was beginning to wonder if this was it and I was literally going to fall apart piece by piece. Today is the first day that it hasn’t been painful to drag myself to work…at least physically. I still feel weak as a kitten and tired, but the bone deep exhaustion seems to be lifting some. Needless to say, I have not been to the gym once during this period, since sitting up at work all day took every ounce of energy and willpower I had and I have barely made it home to crawl into bed and sleep until morning for the past week. Uggh!
There may be a psychosomatic/physiological aspect to some if not all of it. A couple more “friendships” recently, finally died after floundering for some time (their choice to end them as opposed to fixing them, not mine); the winter has become a constant thorn in my side and continues to kick my ass (I swear I can’t remember the last time I felt truly warm or dry) and, after much soul searching and internal struggle, I asked our housemate to move out at the end of March as opposed to staying until the end of July, as originally planned There are a lot of reasons, many of which are private and personal, but it was a decision we came to and a choice we felt we had to make and I’m hoping we will all make it through and past this decisions as friends. I don’t regret the decision, but feel bad about it none the less. I will just say that sharing my home with someone for 9 months is far more taxing than I ever imagined it would be.
In the plus column, I bowled better last Sunday.
For the record, I had actually hoped to be more whimsical today. I decided I would give a shot at trying to be more humorous in my posts, as I enjoyed writing my post yesterday and it seemed to have been received well. I tend to use humor as a therapeutic ploy to get me out of slumps or past bad times (“Laughter through tears is my favorite emotion”). Unfortunately, as I was passing through the first toll booth on the way to work this morning, contemplating what I would write about, I became part of a near parking lot as traffic was inching past a car that had flipped on its side into the meridian and was surrounded by cop cars. I have not been able to get the image out of my head and have been obsessing about it all day: How and why did it happen? Who was in the car? Were they hurt and killed? What if that happened to me or someone I cared about? It really shook me up and has depressed me all day.
Tomorrow is my pass day. I am hoping that getting to stay home and working on some art work and crocheting will be good therapy, physically and mentally. And if that doesn’t work, there’s always cosmos…