BUT, I assure you, the moment these same people have issues, they bring the drama in spades, much more so than the people they purport to dislike for doing the very same thing. Airing their grievances to anyone who will listen, via any venue they have access to, playing the victim and insisting they are beyond reproach, owe nothing to anyone, cannot be held accountable for their words or actions and should be accepted for who they are, warts and all, while refusing to give the same consideration to others. It’s hypocritical, tiresome and boring.
But, unlike those people, some of us recognize when other people are angry or hurt or scared or confused and we recognize what part we play in it and want to contribute to the resolution, as opposed to the problem, because we genuinely care, instead of labeling it “drama” and walking away. We are not too proud or arrogant to apologize for the parts we play in creating the friction and to offer our assistance, even when we don’t get the same in return. We don’t turn our backs on other people, whom we have professed to care about, the minute they require something from us. We are willing to be a little uncomfortable and expose ourselves to fix a problem and build a stronger bond. And we are willing to give as much as we get if given the chance. We are who we say we are.
I am growing to recognize, with more accuracy, the shallow and one-sided people I meet in the world. The ones who are selfish and have nothing to offer but a false promise of friendship and insincere willingness to be there for you. They take what they want from you, whatever you have to offer: money, sex, a place to stay, invitations to parties or introductions to people, then discard you when they no longer have a use for you.
I accept there are people like this in the world; and I accept that, if I am going to be an extroverted, involved, engaging person I am going to meet these people along the way. There’s no avoiding them. The secret is learning to recognize them quickly and invest no time or energy in them; and, if I am blinded by their insincerity and unfortunate enough to be fooled into trusting them or bonding with them only to discover their true natures later, I need to remember:
I have no more lost a friend than I have lost money when discovering my lottery ticket did not win, because you cannot lose something you never had. It’s disappointing, but it’s not devastating. And it’s not drama…